surrender... a word I find in my speech almost daily

"Jesus was forcing His disciples to trust Him. God would have to come through for them because they had nothing else to fall back on.  This place of trust isn't a comfortable place to be; in fact, it flies in the face of everything we've been taught about proper planning. We like finding refuge in what we already have rather than than in what we hope God will provide. But when Christ says to count the cost of following Him, it means we must surrender everything. It means being willing to go without an extra tunic or a place to sleep at night, and sometimes without knowing where we are going."
 Francis Chan

The above quote from "Crazy Love" reminds me so much of how our life has nothing to do with us but all about God, an all consuming and powerful creator who gave us life and everything that we need to live our lives to the full.  Yet our life is but a breadth here on this earth. I am being challenged to live life not for myself or what I can get out of God or this world but how my life will glorify Him. I want to join Him in this adventure of life and not simply ask Him to come along side the destiny I set for myself.

I believe He has been teaching me these things in these past years of my life with purpose as I have come to that place more and more of learning to trust in Him with full abandon. Still, I have a long ways to go where I can fully lean on Him in moments of anxiety, insecurity and doubts of the present and the future. Needless to say this journey is a freeing one and thus as I embark upon my newest journey, I am reminded over and over again to lean on Him and to step out in faith, one step at a time, because He is guiding.

I may not see fully what He is doing or directing me to do. I don't have the complete picture yet. I do, however, have pieces of the puzzle. I will be honest and admit I am scared to take the next steps that He is guiding me down as they will take an act of faith. I have ideas about what the end of this year will look like, however, I know well they could change as has been my life's journey, in particular the last 3 years since I left to do full time missions.  Beyond these steps, I am learning to move forward in faith and absolute trust, much like the disciples must have experienced, and surrender my future to Him. Trusting that He has my steps ordered.

Mid March I will leave Kansas City once again to start a new journey. I will be going to Portland, Oregon for a month to learn more of what the Women and Children's Advocacy Center does and all aspects of its operation as a ministry. I have been trained and seen first hand their training workshops in Costa Rica. A team of us will then travel to S. Africa for a 2 week training in which a church there has invited the WCAC to train some of its members.  From S. Africa, I plan to travel to Australia, where I will stay for  some time with my good friends in Sunshine Coast while figuring out my next steps and traveling and networking with the contacts I have in Australia and then to other locations of Oceania.