He is doing a new thing!

Scene: Wendy's in downtown San Jose, Costa Rica with fend for yourself seating and others lurking to take your table as soon as you get up....

characters: my friend Christy and I, our almost weekly meeting up (after she takes two or three buses down from the mountains and I wait a long time to pick up a bus close to my apartment)

Christy:  "I have something for you." hefting her 30 pound backpack on the table

I smile and think to myself... Oh dear, now what kind of surprise does my spontaneous friend have for me? Out proceeds a rather large seashell... mind you we are not close to the beach, over several hours by car, so she had toted this shell with her over some what of a strenuous journey. 

Christy: "As I was cleaning/shining this shell God told me to give this to you."

Now I am the owner of a fine shell that has been transported back with me months later to my temporary home in Kansas City. She told me that in my next journey/season I was going to be like this seashell that rides the waves. I won't know where I am to go or my next step until I proceed and God will be guiding it every step of the way.

Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.” Isa. 30:21

Of course this was just additional confirmation that He is guiding me but no direct answer or location. My other good friend Marcel and I commited to fasting and praying together for my next steps prior to me leaving Costa Rica. I was somewhat hesitant to return to KC without an idea of my next steps or specific direction. My friend received the same that I would not know my next steps until I arrived back in KC.

Its been a testing of my patience and faith to be home with so little "known." I have been anxious to figure it all out, but He has been so faithful in the midst of it all. I realized once I arrived home, how burntout I was and needed His refreshing and healing. Needless to say its been a difficult past three months but oh so good and a chance for me to learn to TRUST without fear and be healed and restored to a place where soon I will be ready to minister again. I needed to recenter and refocus on Him, my purpose for doing ministry and not the daunting need that exists.

I, as of this week, felt a "go" and a quickening in my pulse to begin taking steps out in faith; knock on those doors and test the waters. For many months now I have felt Him tell me to go where my heart leads me. Maybe to the majority of people that would seem like a huge relief; to me its just scary. Perhaps I am even scared to dream BIG, because honestly I have some crazy dreams.

I have felt for sometime my season in Latin America is over. I have longed to visit other parts of the world but felt that was just my adventurous and exploring side of me. I never thought that maybe it is truly a part of who I am and how God created me to embark upon and work with many nations and people groups. I also began to have this deep need within me to embrace a people group and place as my own and finally root. I know to those who know me well, that may be truly shocking. I have always been a free spirit, living simply with little to no earthly attachments.

So I had to ask myself what is it exactly that makes me tick and where, if I was given the choice to choose any location and ministry, what would that look like? I decided that the most recent tug on my heart was towards rooting somewhere yet would this take away from that innate side of me that still desires to invest in and travel to other parts of the world? How would those things meld together? Was I being crazy in thinking there was a way to do both? Would I be able to root somewhere and pioneer ministry and training on location while still taking and providing support and training abroad?

My answers seem to come through my dialect with friends/contacts with the Women and Children's Advocacy Center as well as those working as leaders in YWAM bases. I am dialoging with the possibility of pioneering and networking with my contacts in Australia/PNG/Samoa/Vanuatu and elsewhere; while still praying about the specific location in this part of the world to root. My ideas for now are to see how I can work with the WCAC (Women and Children's Advocacy Center) and YWAM bases in Oceania, this particular part of the world, and from there doing pioneering, investigation and networking while being available to take the celebrate children training (through the WCAC) to remote locations where people are already working with children and women at risk and just need more support, training and resources. I also want to be back on a base and a part of community life. So, I will most likely work to help as part time staff wherever I end up.

Details and specifics to follow.... still praying and working it out. Will be posting more regularly.